1: So what would you like to get out of coming here today?
2: I don’t know. I just want to talk about some difficulties I’m having I think
1: No problem. We have about 20 minutes, up to an hour if we need more time. You can talk about whatever you like
2: Ok thanks. Well I’m basically just on edge all the time and it’s exhausting. I can’t sleep, I can’t work, I’m isolating myself. In fact I wonder if I might have depression, I don’t know if you might have an opinion on that?
1: On edge all the time? I could imagine that would be exhausting. When you say all the time, you mean like every second of every day?
2: Yep, pretty much
1: Woah, yeah that’s pretty bad news, I can see why you’ve come here. How did you manage to get through whilst you were waiting for the appointment?
2: I don’t know man, it’s been difficult… I have some friends I can talk to, that helps sometimes, but they don’t always say the best things. They’re only trying to help, I know that, but I can see they’re just worried by what I’m saying sometimes, or they just give unhelpful advice, and that doesn’t help
1: Ok, I see… but it helps sometimes?
2: Yeah sometimes, but not all the time. That’s why I’m here
1: Makes sense… So instead of being on edge all the time, what would you prefer?
2: What would I prefer? Not to be on edge I guess
1: And instead?
2: Well, you know, just not on edge… I don’t know
1: On edge all the time… phew…
2: Well yeah… Ok, maybe not all the time. I’m chilled occasionally. Very occasionally. I want to be like that more of the time, obviously
1: Obviously, yeah. That’d be better. So we’re going for chilled more of the time here?
2: Yeah that’d be a good start
1: Ok, what else?
2: hmmm, I don’t know
2: …Just normal I guess. Doing what normal people do, you know? Being normal. Doing normal things. Like I used to.
1: Ok. Chilled more of the time, and just… normal.
1: Ok, let’s start with this… How would you know you’re chilled more of the time, instead of on edge all the time?
2: …I’d be doing normal things again. I’d be back to my normal self.
1: Right. So what might be a typical situation in which you might notice yourself being this way again? Being normal, chilled. Just being back to your normal self
2: Well that’s the problem. I’m not, I’m just on edge, I can’t do anything.
1: Absolutely. So let’s just suppose for a moment that you’ve somehow managed to achieve this, and you’re back to your normal self. Chilled more of the time. Chilled most of the time even, perhaps. A typical situation in which you might notice yourself doing something differently to how you have recently…
2: Oh ok, I see. Hmmm…. No idea
1: Have a moment to think about it. It’s a stretch to think about I’m sure
2: Yes it is. Hmmm…
2: Ok, well, I’m meeting with a friend after this. He always suggests going for a drink later, but I usually say no.
1: So what would you be doing instead? As your back to normal, chilled self?
2: I’d say yes, why not! Sure, let’s go for a drink!… I suppose I could always just have one and go back to my room after an hour or so if I didn’t feel up to staying any longer than that
1: Yeah absolutely, that sounds like a step in the right direction. Can you see yourself doing something like that any time soon?
2: Yeah, of course. I might even do that today, or at the weekend otherwise. I’m invited out all the time, so…
(conversation continues in this vein, with discussion about other situations and further detail about differences the client and others might notice)
1: Nice. Good start. Would you say you’re heading towards being chilled more of the time, back to normal?
2: Yeah… yeah I’d say I am. Thanks
1: Cool. Well, we’re about out of time. Do you feel you need any further professional input? or are you ok to leave it there, see how things go and get back in touch again if you feel you need to?
2: Actually, yeah I think I’ll be ok. Thanks.
1: No problem. You know where we are. You’re welcome any time.
2: Thanks man, see you around.
1: It was a pleasure. You take care. See ya
3 thoughts on “Chilled”
Nice! Nice! Nice! to put it mildly. In addition to following the SFTx process, which was quite clear, you expressed a great deal of empathy which is not always clear that SFTx prcessing does. that is an invaluable part of moving the conversation forward therapeutically. thanks chris for this sharing of your work.
Loved it thanks.
A shiny example of “one foot in acknowledgement and one foot in possibility land” ( words of Bill’OHanlon )
A joy to read a real life example of using SF with keeping your Individual Practitioner Character.